How is Screen Time Affecting Your Relationships?

"Mum! Turn around." Mr X holds my face with two hands and faces it towards him to get my attention.
"Phone off Mum."
The fact that this had to happen at all breaks my heart.

Reality is, I am just addicted to my devices as the next person. I try really hard to use my phone and tablet when the kids aren't around, but I have as much self control with technology as I do with sugar (See '5 Lies I Tell Myself Everyday').

So often I find myself only half paying attention to my family. I'm scrolling through my newsfeed while outside with my kids, searching Pinterest while chatting with the kids over lunch or sitting next to Josh on the lounge - both glued to our phones.
I feel like I use it as an 'escape' so that I feel connected to other adults during the day, maybe it's a coping mechanism so that I don't feel so isolated and alone.

However, it's a terrible addiction that steals away time from your life. Time with your kids and partner, and time achieving daily tasks.

As I have been thinking about my project for next month - Making Memories in August, I have been pondering how I can change my daily interactions with my kids and husband to make our lives better. The conclusion I have come to is that I need to put my devices down.

I have decided that hand in hand with my Making Memories project, I'm going to drastically cut down my screen time and I challenge you to do the same for the next month. I know that being a stay at home parent in particular is isolating and lonely, which is why I'm not ready to swear off it entirely, but I want to make an effort to be present with my kids more often.

I challenge you to think about how much time you spend multitasking with a device or taking 'time out' to be on them.
 I would love to hear how you feel it affects your relationships.

Let's be totally in the moment more often.

For under $50, I feel and look like a million dollars! If I may say so myself..

This week I read an article on Babycenter about the best makeup to be using during pregnancy and motherhood. They claimed it would help with how tired I look (and boy, do I need that!!!) and give me a young, healthy glow...
Having been unhappy with my makeup  for a while (on the days I have the chance to do it..) I figured I would give it a go!
 I changed from Nude by Nature pressed powder with a powder blush and stick concealer, to a BB cream, cream blush and liquid concealer. As you can see, I didn't buy top of the range, just affordable brands.

 I applied everything to the same areas as usual..
 I think the results speak for themselves - not to downplay the importance of the fact that it takes about 1/4 of the time to do my face in the morning.

 These photos were taken only ten minutes apart!

 I feel like I am winning on all fronts.
What are your makeup tips?

What Koala Lou can teach you about bringing home a new baby

Oh my do I LOVE this book.

This book is a fantastic description of what can happen to the older sibling when you bring home a new baby.
When you have a newborn in addition to an older sibling, you are sleep deprived, hormonal and VERY busy.
It's easy to overlook the little things that you used to do with your first child pre-baby.

In the book, Koala Lou goes to great lengths to get Mummy's attention and to feel loved again.

Our children need to know that they are just as important to you as their sibling and you love them just as much, in their own special way.
If you can understand how your child feels loved (5 Love Languages of Children is a great resource!), then you are able to ensure that they still feel connected and special despite the amount of time needed to care for the new arrival.

When Mr X is angry, sooky and mean to the twins, it is often because he is depleted and feeling left out or unloved. Having this book on my shelf is a good way to remind me to do special things with my little man.
It is also a great book to read to your kids to help them understand how much mummy loves them, even if she is busy and looking after the baby.

The Best Advice I Received As A New Mother

As a new parent, you get bombarded with advice from every person you have ever met. A lot of it I found extremely unhelpful, contradictory, and sometimes really offensive.

These are the three that I found the most helpful and I still live by. 

1 - You can't spoil a baby 

I can't tell you how many people have offered their opinion on how I should have been settling and responding to my children. 

The good old "a baby never died from crying" chestnut.

 I have felt pressured to let my babies cry it out or at least cry for 'just a minute' because they can't think you will come every time they cry. 

Actually they can - because I will. I loved having twins because it gave me an excuse to go straight in and comfort my baby incase the other woke up. 

If that's the method you want to use - that's fantastic! I'm just saying don't feel like you have to be doing it just because that's what others are telling you to do. 

You can't spoil a baby. Don't feel bad for giving them what you are wired to do - comfort them. 

2 - The smell of the house can change everything

A house that smells good appears cleaner and more welcoming. There are a few different things that make me look like a much more efficient housewife and only take seconds to do that I turn to regularly. 

Lavender spray - I have a bottle of water and lavender oil to spritz if I have anyone arriving.. This gives the allusion of recent cleaning..

Cooking - if Josh is about to walk in the door and I want to look like wonder woman, I throw some butter and onion in a pan quickly.. Then the mess on the floor is not the first thing he notices, he walks in the door saying "something smells good!!" and thinking I'm just amazing for being so freaking organised. 

Bleach - yep, I don't clean the bathrooms as often as I should.. But if I need to make everything seem freshly cleaned, I splash some bleach in the toilet and light a candle, if it smells scrubbed, that's good enough for today!

3 - Don't try to tidy up during the day

This one I heard back when Mr X was born but didn't pay any attention to until now. It made no sense in my head, I kept thinking that if I ran around picking up toys and wiping down surfaces all day long that by the time kids were in bed, the house would be cleaner overall. 

It's really not. I would spend all day cleaning up after three toddlers and at the end of the day, my house still looked like a natural disaster had hit. 

Now I clean and tidy when the kids are in bed. 

Anything before then is pointless. I am a much more relaxed mother for it. 

5 Lies I Tell Myself Everyday

1 - I won't eat sweets today

One of the challenges of being a stay at home mum is that if there is any junk food in the house, you are tempted all day every day. Every morning I wake up thinking "today I am going to start to eat healthy" and come 9:30 I'm squatting behind the fridge door secretly stuffing my face with caramel slice. 

2 - I won't turn the tv on today

I have such good intentions when it comes to limiting or eliminating screen time for my kids in the morning. On the best of days, I'll get to horror hour and crack under the pressure of trying to cook dinner with Miss I and Miss C simultaneously trying to climb my legs while screaming and Mr X trying to 'help' me with the chopping. I'm sure my neighbours would have heard me yelling " OK!!! Who is ready to watch some Wiggles/Frozen/Shrek" at around the same time most days. 

3 - I won't bribe the kids with food

I never wanted to be a mother that used food to get what I want. Every morning I am determined to stop. However...

The three magic words in my house are "bikkies", "bananas" and "toast" and these things can give me a trip to the toilet solo, the chance to hide with my caramel slice or get a job done that requires two hands.  

If I'm honest, right now I'm handing out bikkies just to get this done. 

4 - I will catch up on the laundry

I am the first to admit that I suck at keeping up with the washing. Because it doesn't shout or cry at me to get attention and its hidden behind a door, I just don't remember. 

Despite my best intentions, I think my whole family should just get used to fishing clean clothes out of a basket for the time being. 

5 - I will get so much housework done while the girls sleep

On the days that the twins actually sleep at the same time, I have a list of cleaning that should be achieved. You know, the stuff that's too hard to do with toddlers and I'm too tired to do at nighttime - mopping, bathrooms etc. 

Instead, every time this happens I sit down for just a second to catch up on Facebook/Instagram/Pinterest and then all of a sudden it's been an hour, I've eaten three packets of chips and everyone is up again. Oops!

Transitioning to Toddler Beds..

We decided to transition the twins into toddler beds before our next little bundle comes along..

The first night was last night.
Josh and I reviewed what we learnt at Tresillian with Mr X and tried to implement the same method with the girls.

Baby gate on the door, nothing but beds in the room.
Go in every time they get out of bed, don't speak and put them straight back into bed.
 Shushing for comfort from outside the door, just out of sight.

Last night I had my amazing child settler (Josh) to help me through. He did a brilliant job and had them down in a matter of 20 minutes!! However I have found, for whatever reason, the kids tend to be a lot more difficult and emotional for me.. So I was more than a little nervous when I had to do it all on my own!!

So, this morning I set myself up just out of sight and spent 45 minutes going in and out putting girls in bed - I must say, it's slightly more challenging with twins (and certainly without Josh!!) but I feel so proud that I have succeeded!!

I like the methods Tresillian implement for this transition, because I am offering a verbal comfort, they learn that bed time means bed time, and they learn to self settle.
How old were your kids when you put them in beds?