This is the first step.

I'm terrible at asking anyone for help. I am one of those people who tries to do everything on my own because I don't feel comfortable telling people that I'm not coping.
I mean, they are my children - so I should be able to handle them on my own, right?

 But this characteristic has one terrible consequence.. Because you can't reach out, you slowly get closer and closer to breaking point. Everyone's breaking point is different.

Today, after four months with a new baby living on up to 4 hours sleep a night, two tantruming and sleepless toddlers and a threenager - I've realised that I'm too close.
Too close to losing control, too close to my breaking point.
Today I'm asking for help. I'm seeing my GP because he can get me into Tresillian.

This is a magical place, filled with magical people that spend their days and nights helping you find routine, get your children to sleep, and give you techniques to get through when you've reached this point.
 When you feel like you've tried everything and you are still under water.

I feel completely defeated, beyond exhausted and totally useless - but I'm also determined to get the help I need to look after my family. They need me, so I need to find help.

If you need help, your GP can help you too. There are so many people and organisations that are there ready to do just that.

To find out more about Tresillian visit:
https://www.tresillian.org.au/

Surviving the tantrum years with your strong-willed child (x 3)

I have 3 very spirited and very gorgeous children.. There are many tactics I use on a daily basis to survive each curveball my little angels throw at me..
Remember it's all about will power, you only have to be just stronger than them. I mean, they're toddlers.. How hard can it be?? Haha..

1. Distraction - I become extremely engrossed in a task and make it seem rather exciting.. This is my first attempt to stop a toddler in the early tantrum stages. I use the 'dinner theory' - if I'm enjoying it, they want to be doing it/eating it too.

2. Encouragement - this gem is one of my mums from when I was her little angel. I pretend I'm really enjoying their tantrum and encourage them to scream louder/kick harder/ cry longer. Because as you know, a strong-willed tantrum thrower never wants to do what mum wants, and this sometimes will be enough to stop a tantrum even in full swing. Warning - it may also make it worse.. Awesome right?

3. Water off a duck's back - this one I use when I have multiple children screaming at once and I need to address one problem at a time. I am the kind of person that feels very emotional when my kids cry. So, I visualise the crying washing over me but not affecting me so that I can focus on meeting my kids needs one at a time. This one is for those bad days when you haven't quite reached #4 desperation.. Yet..

4. Denial - another of my mum's methods (yes, I was a such a gift of a child to my mother). This tactic is all about pretending that these aren't your children. Now, this one you reserve for those super bad days. Yes, you go about caring for them but you mentally separate yourself from the situation so as not to break down crying. I say things to myself like - "oh that poor mother", "how trying for that mother to have to endure that" and "gosh, my heart goes out to her, I should pour her some wine..".  I know this may seem drastic (and a little crazy!), but I assure you, if you have strong-willed children, some days it is 100% necessary to maintain your sanity.

You can do this! I'd love to hear your tactics too! I always need fresh ideas with my ever-changing precious little bundles.

The Threenager Emerges

My beautiful boy has been going through some changes lately.. He has decided (finally!) that he is ready for toilet training, he all of a sudden dislikes all foods that aren't watermelon, cheese and crackers, and he has grown an attitude.

These are all normal and expected at his age. So at least I may find comfort in the thought that most other mums of three years olds are going through the same thing..
However, it doesn't make the attitude any easier to parent..

Let me give you an example from earlier today..
Mr X "I want some watermelon".
Me (raised eyebrows) "That's not how you ask for something. Try again."
Mr X *mumbling quietly*
Me "I'm sorry, I can't hear you. What would you like?"
Mr X "I TOLD YOU FOUR TIMES!"
I had to turn around so he did not see me laugh.

Who is this and what has he done with my boy? I am still in shock at this attitude.

What's your favourite threenager story?